Do you want to leave your shyness behind and look for new ways to be more sociable? Do you feel like chatting with new people but you get paralyzed when the moment of truth comes? How can we favor our social welfare to convey exactly the image of ourselves that we want to communicate?
Today society requires us to have a series of things or materials, it may well be a car, a mobile, a computer, etc.
But he also asks us to have a series of techniques and tools to communicate with others, meet new people and be bold in social situations, so that we must have the skills of sociable people.
Among the characteristics of sociable people we find spontaneity, joy, intensity and motivation in carrying out actions, self-confidence and fun to transmit to others and create a pleasant atmosphere by engaging in pleasant relationships with others.
However, although it may seem that people are sociable by nature, the truth is that it is not always the case.
Being sociable is a skill like any other such as climbing a rope and to develop it is necessary to train it.
If one day we wake up in the morning and decide to run 5 kilometers, the first day we may not get it but if we train daily running a few kilometers each time, there will come a time that we will be able to achieve it.
Exactly the same happens with being more sociable, if we begin to gradually implement a series of skills, we will finally get out of the comfort zone and develop that social facet overcoming those fears that stop us on some occasions.
People with problems of sociability have difficulty managing situations where they must face their own insecurity and shyness, they face social situations with fear and anguish that can be observed in the way of speaking or moving through nonverbal language .
These types of people have two main sources that cause their conflict; On the one hand, they have poor self-esteem that they do not know how to overcome, as well as low self-confidence for what they act through fear. On the other hand, the lack of social skills means that they do not know what to say, how to behave, how to address someone or what to do, so this paralyzes them when it comes to relating to others.
How social are you?
To start working on your sociability you must first discover the degree of socialization you have and see what step you are in,
- While you are in the first one in which you have phobia of people and to establish some type of contact with them.
- If you find yourself in the middle where you are able to hold a conversation for a short period of time because your batteries run out quickly.
- Or while you are at the top of the pyramid and you are a legend that was born to interact with others.
Let’s start from the bottom up.
- The first step. Nobody takes you out of the house, you lock yourself in your microecosystem and from there you don’t go out no matter what. You can end the world, that you have no intention of leaving those four walls.
- The second step. You leave home because it is necessary but if it were not so, you would save it. You move to work, school, etc. You try to go unnoticed ducking your head and waiting for everything to happen quickly.
- Third step You appear on the street occasionally and maintaining the distances, avoid physical contact.
- Fourth step You have your group of friends, and you go to places although they know that you are shy and any type of social situation makes you alert.
- The fifth step. Here we are in the meridian of the pyramid. You have a social life and you leave home frequently, you act in a normal way until you are introduced to someone of the opposite sex and that is when you enter the block. Your battery is running out and you go into saving mode so it costs you not to stutter or say more than two sentences in a row.
- The sixth step. You are not the alma mater of the party but you have a series of social skills that allow you to have a correct and harmonious social treatment. You do not have a special relevant influence but you are present.
- The seventh step. You have your group of friends, you are friendly and you are able to bring fun to the group. You can meet new people and even flirt, but nothing more. When you act, you change the gear and go backwards.
- The eighth step. You have enough security and confidence to develop successfully in various social interactions, meet new entity and seduce it with your gifts of attraction.
- The ninth step. You always like yourself, you are popular and people know you. They are interested in talking with you because you transmit positive energy and that is why you are always invited to all the events that are organized.
- The tenth step. We have reached the top of the mountain. From here everyone can see you, approach you. If you don’t go to the party, the party goes to you. You are known for your way of being showing your innate power of seduction. You carry the social in your blood and connect with everyone.
Now, in addition to training our emotional intelligence, what can we do to easily approach the tenth step?
How to be a more sociable person: 12 express steps to become a more sociable person
Being a more sociable person is not something that is achieved overnight, but it requires time for practice, action and facing the fears that appear in our head and only serve to immobilize us and make us feel bad.
Decide to develop your social skills
Take your potentials for a walk to create constructive relationships with others and allow others to enjoy your company. Be patient and start by having conversations with people you know little or just don’t know, go out with groups of friends and allow yourself to open up to interact with new people. You never know what a simple “hello” can become.back to menu ↑
Look at the eyes
Maintaining eye contact is very important, since through the eyes a lot is transmitted and manifests security and confidence with oneself. When you speak and do not look at you, it is an indication that this person is not interested in the conversation or is bored.back to menu ↑
Start by taking small steps
When you enter somewhere, say hello to others and try to start a simple conversation with someone. You can start talking about routine issues such as traffic or weather and when you have more security you can talk about deeper things. This way you will be motivated to continue moving forward.back to menu ↑
Join the people
If you are at work or at school and are at rest, go with people to eat or where they go, so you can start building relationships with others and start doing activities with the group.back to menu ↑
Share your tastes
Start moving and find people who have the same tastes and hobbies as you. In that environment it is easier to meet real friends to enjoy doing what you like.back to menu ↑
Do not get frustrated if any conversation does not end as you expected
The best thing you can do is launch yourself into social relationships without expectations. Losing fear does not mean that everything goes as we would like it to be, you should keep in mind that each person is a world and may have their personal problems or conflicts that we do not know. Don’t be discouraged by that and keep showing yourself to others by focusing on the positive you are getting.back to menu ↑
Invite and plan with others
Do not expect a meeting or an event near you to socialize. Organize a trip or plan with people that allow you to spend a pleasant time and leave the feeling of wanting to repeat.back to menu ↑
Commit to other people
Try to commit yourself to others and to yourself, that is, if you remember an hour, try to be punctual. Timedness is a negative sign that the person or people who are waiting do not always have to accept it. Control the time to arrive at the agreed time without rushing or racing.back to menu ↑
Assimilate that contingencies exist
Multiple situations can happen that make you cancel an appointment. If it is inevitable and you have no choice but to cancel it, try to offer other options of days to carry out that departure. This way you will show interest in spending time with people.back to menu ↑
Pay special attention to your appearance
The first step to be more sociable and open to people is that you gain confidence and confidence in yourself, for this you must be satisfied with yourself. Personal care is very important to feel good. Self-confident people have a positive attitude that is reflected from the inside out. To be well with others you must feel good about yourself.back to menu ↑
Smile whenever someone looks at you
The smile is a very important aspect in your nonverbal language. Showing a positive and open attitude creates a warm and comfortable climate that attracts others. Smiling makes you have a good image and thank others showing sympathy. Start by taking care of your smile. If you like your smile, you will share it more naturally.back to menu ↑
Don’t think too much about how you should act
Thinking too much does not enjoy others. If you are spontaneous and natural it will help you to be yourself and overcome the fear of ridicule. Remember that the main thing is that you feel good.